Time to open up

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Time to open up

Postby Sc00terDog » Mon Jan 23, 2017 3:12 am

If you aren't interested about my personal life or you might not care at all, than don't read it. This is to help me relieve stress since it does help to open up. Fair warning, I talk about a lot of things that happened in my life that are not fun at all.

So, hi, it's Sc00tz. I've been pretty quiet about most of my personal life. But today I want to open up a bit. I was born September 16th 2002 in South Korea. I don't know my real parents because I am adopted. March 2003 my parents that I have today picked me up and brought me to my home today, in Virginia. My early years were fine, just a typical time as a 4-9 year old. But life would soon get a lot more tough. I would start getting bullied for reasons I still don't know today . This one person who bullied me also happened to be the most popular kid in the school. My closest friends started leaving me because the most popular kid started to bully me and they didn't want to associate with me. This was the start of depression. Even moving to a new school, with people I knew better than before, I was still sad. People stressing me out because they want to know everything about what happened at my old school. They wouldn't stop talking about it. I got popular in school because this was the 3rd time I switched schools. I had more friends but at the same time, I still felt stressed. School kept getting harder and homework kept stressing me out as well. My parents started pushing me to be a straight "A" student. I kept getting stressed as they kept pushing me to do schoolwork. I slowly started growing more stressed since they never seemed to talk to me about anything other than school. Middle School isn't much better. I got into a small fight with a popular kid and now I'm popular at the school for being an asshole. I got my friends who want to be with popular kids but with me. They typically choose the popular kids. I would get made fun of by people for various reasons. Everything kept spiraling down. The only thing going on for me was baseball. The only thing I looked forward to in my life was baseball. All I wanted to do was baseball, but my parents kept pushing me to become a straight A student. This caused many fights. I really wanted to focus on baseball but my parents thought about school. This made me more and more stressed which also led to depression. I suffer from depression. Currently today I am still not doing the best. I want to continue working on baseball, but my parents still want to have me work on school. They know I'm stressed, and I know it too.

This is just to open up since it's nice to open up but also wanted to thank you, everyone on LC, for also making me look forward to something. Whenever I would come on here, I know I'll be greeted by nice people. I will always support everyone on here, no matter what happens in my life. So once again, thank all of you so much for being one thing that I can look forward to in my life.

They say live life to the fullest, but I believe that's impossible.
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Re: Time to open up

Postby TheJonLondon » Mon Jan 23, 2017 5:16 am

There's no direct reason why someone bullies you. They do it to anyone they want and it makes them feel better about themselves, that's why they do it. Most people have to go through it and there's no easy solution. I obviously won't recommend the stuff I did to get rid of bullies(because its a shitty thing to do), but the best thing you can do, at least in my opinion, is to be nice and to be the best person you could be to people(which should lead to more people who like you in general + more friends). Strength in numbers. Compliment people on their looks, have a random talk with new people you don't know well, join clubs to meet new people, etc. I know this is a weird solution to say(and maybe you already do this a little, but do it more), but you'd be surprised at how this ends up setting up a foundation. Just nice things you can say or talk to with people in school and most will be your friend. So many people don't do this in school. More people you're friends with/more people who think positively of you, the better everything will be in general. More people on your side, the less likely a bully will even bother to go after you. I know its easier said than done, but its better than the generic "just ignore the bullies" or "tell a teacher". Coming from experience, I haven't had much success with those generic solutions(obviously sometimes it will work, but if bullying continues, then they aren't the best strategies). You can still try those things, but I have a feeling you prob tried that. Even if what I said doesn't work, in general, stay strong and keep moving forward against these bullies. I just feel like if I could go back in time and change how I dealt with bullies, I'd probably do what I recommended and just have more people look at me in a positive light. Be the best person you could be to people and good things happen. Always keep close with the friends you do have and the friends you make in the future. Many of them will be there for you. You will get through with these bully problems, we all go through it. Just gotta keep strong.

As long as your grades are relatively good, don't get too stressed about the whole "straight A's" thing. Obviously do your best, but don't push it way too hard. Too many people get too stressed over this and it really effects them. I know parents can be ridiculously pushy with getting god like grades, but just know, as long as you get relatively good grades, you will be good. You don't have to have straight A's to be successful. You don't need to get into an ivy league college to be successful. You'll have plenty of opportunities to be successful. Just never give up in terms of what you want to be. I've heard tons of people who had a lot of hard time in school and still reach what they want to be. Many people who are friends with my mom have kids who had really shitty grades(like really bad) -> they get into medical school -> still become doctors. What did these people have that many people who had better grades not have? They never gave up. For example, one of these people got into medical school after getting rejected 5 straight yrs and then eventually got into medical school and became a doctor, but some of these people who had way better grades just quit the moment they face adversity(like getting rejected one yr or getting a bad grade in a biology class and just dropping the class + switching majors). I've seen and heard people just giving up way too easily. So yes, try your best. But just know, it doesn't take straight A's to get where you want. There's a lot more that goes into getting where you want.

Anyways if you don't agree with anything I said, its all good lel. I just wanted to maybe give you some potential option(s), maybe theyre not all A+ options, but I guess its just something to think about. LC and all the people here will always be there for you :<3:
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Re: Time to open up

Postby MineLars » Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:12 am

Scoootz :<3:,

I'd pokemon fight them if i were there, but too bad i'm not. Anyways i so agree with what jon says! Don't try to stay around people you dislike or those who dislike you, join and try different clubs or do special school activities and focus on nice people, this will not only get you less stressed but it will also make you happier!

Eh im not the best guy to advise you on grades as mine aren't, great really, but i'll survive with mine, so i bet you can do with B's or C's too. You can always come to us anywaysif you feel like talking and stuff! :<3: :)
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Re: Time to open up

Postby Pizzanakin » Mon Jan 23, 2017 9:21 am

I agree that Jon's advice is really good. I wouldn't say my years in high school were bad, but I only started doing what he said in university and I'm enjoying my time here 1000x more because everyone else is also just really nice.

That said, just keep going! Life will get better. Like I mentioned, uni will probably be a better stage for you, since you'll be in classes with people who share your interests (which is your study) and you aren't put together with a lot of random people of your age. People will also be more mature in their behaviour, so just keep looking forward to that. And maybe that will also help you motivate more to work for school, so you'll get less stressed. :D

Edit: just wanted to add that high school is also just a phase, and that you only become stronger and more sympathising because of the bullying. In a few years the bully might be full of regret while you have a happy life with many positive relationships.
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Re: Time to open up

Postby henm2000 » Mon Jan 23, 2017 10:42 am

Well i'll just give my input here :d.

When I was in middle school I was builled for being an atheist, it got to the point of pepole beating (can you even say that? idek) me weekly. I dealt with that by just not giving a fuck and focusing on other stuff (like friends and school), I know it's easier said than done but i believe you can get throw it.

As for the grades, just set yourself a goal and think how much you're willing to work for it, and just be real about how important it is to you, everyone wants straight A's but if you're not willing to work hard for it so you shouldn't get stressed about it.

I hope i helped a bit :d
gl in life <3

Edit: it gets better with age :d
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Re: Time to open up

Postby Bear » Wed Jan 25, 2017 4:03 am

I don't have much advice to help you with the bullying but just keep your head up. Anything that happens today probably wont matter next month and definitely wont in a year. It's hard to do but if you ever just have those feelings of hopelessness come over you, just think about that.

And don't push yourself to do well on school too much. Baseball is your passion and you also shouldn't ever give up that because that's something you love and defines you. Of course school matters and you gotta learn the right balance between school/sports but don't overstudy and not have any time to relax. At the same time, make sure you don't give yourself too much time to relax (which includes games lol) and then lose time sleeping just doing homework. Again, you just have to find that balance between school/sports and understand that in order to do well in both of those things (which you should) you gotta limit other things in life and that it will be stressful. But always remember, things will be better in the future because if you do stay focused and don't let any bulling/parents yelling/whatever get to your head, it most certainly will.
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Re: Time to open up

Postby koiboi86 » Fri Jan 27, 2017 11:28 am

people bully because they're jackasses.

A lot of stuff has been covered but the biggest thing i can say, dont let the depression get the best of you. work on it, find someone to talk to, find something that helps. I know what its like and how hard it can make life, just find what works for you and keep up with it.
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